Floated in on email today....
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What's your political party, Democrat, Republican, or Southerner?
This test will help you decide.
Imagine: You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small
children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the
corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you. You are carrying a Glock cal .40, and you are an expert shot.
You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.
What do you do?
DEMOCRAT:
Well, that's not enough information to answer the question! Does the man look poor! Or oppressed? Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack? Could we run away? What does my wife think? What about the kids? Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand? What does the law say about this situation? Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children? Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me? Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me? If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me? Should I call 9-1-1? Why is this street so deserted? We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior. This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.
REPUBLICAN:
BANG!
SOUTHERNER:
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
( click.....sounds of reloading ).
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy!
Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?
Son: Git-r-Dun, Pop! Can I shoot the next one!
Wife: You ain't taking that to the Taxidermist!
I'll give Aero a little edge over Precision - but I'd really have to see all 12 months of both to be sure. Who makes the Peach? Revolver or automatic?
ReplyDeleteI'm Wet With Compassion
ReplyDeleteHow could you ask such a question? Only those with respect for third world cultures should be allowed to answer questions like this?
OK. Now how do I get the sarcasm tag off? Of cours the answer is bang. Maybe bang bang. No use wasting a lot of ammunition if you can shoot him dead with one or two shots.
As a conservative libertarian, my answer is:
ReplyDeletebang, bang, pause, bang
i.e., a double-tap to the chest, pause to let the target stop, and then one to the head (what experienced African fighters call a mozambique). Then start the next iteration of my OODA loop. No sense in wasting ammunition, endangering bystanders, and besides he might have some nasty friends around.
Okay. I hate guns, I'm afraid of them personally, but I absolutely believe in the right to have them. I'm a bit late to that position and my eye is going bad so a gun I'll never have.
ReplyDeleteSo my answer to the little quiz is:
I never walk down the street without a Southerner at my side!
Shoot, Bubba! Shoot!
"Mommy, do you miss Daddy?"
ReplyDelete"Yes, dear, but then I reload."
As a conservative libertarian, my answer is:
ReplyDeletebang, bang, pause, bang
i.e., a double-tap to the chest, pause to let the target stop, and then one to the head (what experienced African fighters call a mozambique). Then start the next iteration of my OODA loop.
Hear, hear.
jd:
ReplyDeleteColonel Boyd would be proud!!!