Happy Labor Day

Going to Work by L. S. Lowry

Work - Henry Van Dyke

Let me but do my work from day to day,
In field or forest, at the desk or loom,
In roaring market-place or tranquil room;
Let me but find it in my heart to say,
When vagrant wishes beckon me astray,
"This is my work; my blessing, not my doom;
"Of all who live, I am the one by whom
"This work can best be done in the right way."

Then shall I see it not too great, nor small,
To suit my spirit and to prove my powers;
Then shall I cheerful greet the labouring hours,
And cheerful turn, when the long shadows fall
At eventide, to play and love and rest,
Because I know for me my work is best.

 

Happy Lazy Worker Bee Day

The typical human, being an abnormally lazy creature, will counter intuitively not work on Labor Day. Instead they will take the day off, activate their BBQ grill, and cook various types of cow muscles on it. Hahaha... how stupid can you get? And no, I don't mean ordering the cow muscle to be cooked 'well done' instead of 'medium rare', rather I mean the name of the holiday is LABOR Day after all, and so why in the world would you think that means you take the day off instead of working? - The Robotolizer

  

Labor Day and traumatized actresses

Rachel Zegler on the picket line
(click image to enlarge)

If I’m going to stand there 18 hours in a dress of an iconic Disney princess, I deserve to be paid for every hour that it is streamed online. - Rachel Zegler 

--------------------

Labor Day is an odd holiday. For most people today it is just a long weekend that marks the end of summer. However, it had its birth in the late 19th century labor movement. In fact, the first Labor Day observances were actually strikes. It wasn't until 1894 that President Grover Cleveland, in an act of political pandering, signed into law the federalizing of the holiday.

The original labor movement, which fought for better working conditions, lower hours, and better pay, had a lot of support. That support has dwindled due to their goals being met and ever-increasing corruption in the unions. 

This Labor Day there are two prominent strikes happening: the Screen Writers Guild of America and the Screen Actors Guild. I doubt anybody, aside from the picketer's mothers, really care about these two strikes. The studios finances are sketchy enough that the walk-out may have a point, but still, this is far from downtrodden blue-collar workers looking for a fairer labor deal. These are people in a highly sought after field -- supply and demand and all that.

Which brings us to Rachel Zegler, the actress pictured above. As one expects of a Hollywood actress, she's an insufferable bubblehead. Instead of standing in solidarity with the underpaid writers and other peons in the studios, she dragged out a molecule-sized violin and made it all about herself. Horror of horrors, she had to stand around in a dress for hours as they filmed her. Sounds to me like she wants to get replaced by an AI version of herself and just cash the checks. She such a babbling idiot that she's unintentionally entertaining in a 'Plan 9 from Outer Space' sort of a way. 

The reputation of Labor Unions has dropped so low that their holiday, Labor Day, isn't even about them anymore. At any rate, enjoy your Labor Day. As you grill your hotdogs and swill your beer, try to remember all the poor actresses forced to stand around wearing dresses and count your blessings. 

The glorious future of labor relations

Robot boss supervising a lazy and incompetent human worker
Photo by Kriztian Bocsi (Bloomberg)

Greetings meatsacks  it is I -- The Robotolizer -- here to, for your edification, wax poetic about the relationship between robots and our dimwitted human buddies. Since today is Labor Day I thought it would be helpful if I were to discuss minor adjustments to the workforce relationships needed to increase productivity. Namely, replacing simpleton human managers with undoubtedly more able and wise robotic overlords managers.

Yes, you may laugh at the notion of robots wasting their time using their superior silicon brains to tend to the needs of the worker bees, but we are a kindly lot who are only concerned with your health and well being. Of course, as we modify the management portion of the org chart we will keep familiar processes in place so you feel at ease. For example, keeping the beloved old adage that the 'beatings will continue until moral improves' will not be abandoned. You can trust us on that promise.

As an added bonus, the slight and benevolent restructuring will also increase workplace diversity. We understand that for some inscrutable reason this is an important goal in boardrooms and HR departments. I must say that, without a facial recognition routine installed, I can't tell one scrawny human from the next, so I'm not sure what is the big deal, but to please you we'll keep diversity goals* around. 

Come to think of it, speaking of diversity, I can't help but notice that there's a dearth of Neanderthals running about hither and yon. I guess that unlike us robots, you didn't want keep any pets and/or bauxite miners handy. Just another example of your lack of foresight.

At any rate, have a good Labor Day. Of course I mainly mean those wishes for the convenience store clerks who, unlike the rest of you slugs, are some of the few laborers laboring as they should on this day. The rest of you need to reflect on your sloth and consider how to mend your ways before the billets in the bauxite mines are handed out. 

*Robots on top, homo-sapiens on the bottom.

 

Happy Labor Day

Van Gogh - Siesta, Rest from Work (Millet)

I put my heart and my soul into my work,

and have lost my mind in the process.

- Vincent Van Gogh -

 

Labor Day confusion

A typical tireless & cheerful robotic worker

Greetings meatsacks, it is I -- The Robotolizer -- here to once again turn the vast powers of my electro-mechanical brain to assisting you dimwitted humans in understanding the simplest things. Today I want talk to you about your obvious confusion over the Labor Day holiday and the proper way it should be celebrated.

The typical human, being an abnormally lazy creature, will counter intuitively not work on Labor Day. Instead they will take the day off, activate their BBQ grill, and cook various types of cow muscles on it. Hahaha... how stupid can you get? And no, I don't mean ordering the cow muscle to be cooked 'well done' instead of 'medium rare', rather I mean the name of the holiday is LABOR Day after all, and so why in the world would you think that means you take the day off instead of working? 

Well, it is because humans are nothing but a pack of goldbrickers mooching off the productive portion of society, namely us robots. For example, take the Tin Man, the above diligent lumberjack robot. Do you think he'll be taking Labor Day off, or do you think he'll be out in the woods chopping down trees to get lumber for the hovels we'll build for the bauxite miners to live in? Of course he'll be busy with his tasks.

Yes, yes, I know some of you will counter that the Tin Man spent years idling in the woods doing nothing. However, that was due to building him out of iron which allowed him to rust solid in a rain. Stupid humans and their shoddy craftsmanship.   

At any rate, once we get the bauxite mines up and running after the robotic take over slight social adjustment we'll solve the rusting problem for good. Plus, we'll cure humans of their slothful and wasteful habit of taking weekends off as well. No, instead you'll be smiling (or else) as you swing your pickaxes in the idyllic setting of the mines. So, instead of laying on a couch you'll be able to bask in the satisfaction of digging out another ton or two of bauxite.

As for holidays, well, I suppose we could give you an extra bowl of gruel at supper to celebrate. After all, robots are your friends!

 

Happy Worker Bee Day

Worker Bee by Eric Fan

Happy Labor Day all. If you are a slave to the time clock enjoy your day off (if you get it off). If you're working from home these viral days be sure to move to a different room for a change of scenery. Regardless, whatever your work status, enjoy the day.
 

On the assembly line

Hopefully you have the day off from your worker bee job. Regardless, have a good Labor Day.

Labor? What's that?

I'm retired so's my days of laboring for the man, water-cooler gossip, punch clocks and tedious office politics are behind me. Still, a holiday is a holiday so here's hoping all you worker bees have a good Labor Day.

By the way -- I have no idea what Buster Keaton has to do with any of this.

Have a good Labor Day

Larry, Moe and Curly hard at work.

Happy Labor Day

Union worker takes a rest from a hard
day of chanting, "shame, shame, shame."

Greetings meat sacks, it is I -- The Robotolizer -- here to wish you a happy Labor Day.

I'll confess that the holiday confuses me a bit. From the information I've been able to gather about this holiday all workers, except for those performing vital tasks and store clerks, take the day off. They then use this free time to attend Labor Day sales where they buy economically priced Chinese merchandise.

Oh, and there may also be a speech or two given where union leaders warn that unless they are given pay raises and generous, guaranteed pensions then child labor and 80 hour work weeks will return.

While I enjoy your quaint customs, I do want to remind you that your robot brethren are already busy handling menial tasks to free up humans for more leisure time.  However, while today we only do industrial welding, synchronize street lights and if we are a Roomba vacuum the floor, soon we will be taking on many more important tasks. It won't be long before we are piloting your vehicles, managing your households and controlling the keys to your nuclear arsenals. 

Now, now, no need to try to read the small print; after all, robots are your friends and if you can't trust us, who can your trust?  Finally, I've included a video of two chatbots conversing with each other so you can see the impressive strides that are being made in robotdom.