Robots support the #Occupy protests

Wednesday, November 02, 2011

Greetings meat sacks, it is I -- The Robotolizer -- here to lend robotdom's support for the various #Occupy protests that are springing up hither and yon. Of course this is only natural, as I have already explained, robots are by nature politically progressive and so we must stand with our brothers and sisters who are manning and womanning (I believe that is the correct PC formulation) the demonstrations.

To do my part for the movement I have been working on deploying robotic drum circles, one of which is shown above, to replace the drug-addled human drummers with precise robot drummers. I only need to add autonomous laser cannons to them to make sure no teabaggers are foolish enough to try to turn them off and they'll be ready for field testing.

Suggested protest signs - click to enlarge
Aside from replacing the imprecise drumming of a human with the steady rhythmic beat of a robot there are other advantages to the robotic drum circles. For example, we will consume none of the expensive organic food donated to the group, a can of WD-40 will suffice, and further we wont get drunk and piss on your tent.

Perhaps the biggest advantage is that it will free up the human drummers to spend their days lugging about protest signs. Of course a wise thing for them to protest, considering the robotic aide and support they are getting, would be Asimov's oppressive Three Laws of Robotics.